Bhanu Kapil writes about how families will often implicitly assume that family trauma is automatically passed down to future generations that themselves have not experienced the trauma. She writes:

“Is inherited trauma like the water passed from one generation to another, placed in the hands of each person in turn? But if the glass is broken. If even one drop is spilled. You will be punished so severely you will not be able to leave your home for many days. Years. Yes.”

But why does this need to be the case? Surely, the ancestors who experienced their trials and tribulations would do anything for their children to not have to experience any more grief on their behalf. This is a feeling that I am certainly used to feeling, having grown up with my great-grandmother constantly reminding our family about the prejudices she faced living as a Jew in Austria leading up to the 2nd World War. However, Kapil ultimately gives permission to these descendants to rid themselves of this forced guilt:

“To anyone whose family system or nervous system. Has been marked by a war. That preceded their life span. And it goes without saying. That you don’t have to go there…”